Page 24 - Masala Lite Issue 158 | February 2024

24 SPILL THE CHAI

ANONYMOUS
Business Owner

Context
I don’t know much about politics and
don’t make a habit of reading the news.
However, I cannot steer my eyes away
from the casualties and the inhumane
treatment of Palestinians at this point
in time. I don’t care about any of the
backstories, the excuses, and the
justification of the merciless killing
and despicable treatment of innocent
civilians over there, particularly the
children. I have realised that this is
a line for me and my morality, and it
has deeply affected the view I have of
some of my friends. I am also aware
that there are other sad issues in the
world that are occurring, but this event
Community members reveal how is in our faces every day.
they’ve kept friendships strong despite Life Tweaks to Accommodate this Realisation
disagreements and modern-day trials.
1. Unfortunately, what is happening in Gaza is a genocide. Those that outwardly
BY AMORNRAT SIDHU have defended the actions carried out by Israelis and the US in conversations
cannot be my friend – at least for now. I have distanced myself from them.
Rightly or wrongly, my opinion is that disproportionate punishment of people,
especially innocents, is just not okay, and it’s too extreme of an accommodation
Friendships are on trial more than ever. Political circumstances, lifestyle choices,
and life changes are a few of the factors that have tried and tested friendships. for me to be around those that have the opposite view.
What are a few of the factors that have rocked the boat on friendships and how 2. Regarding my friends that are not speaking out outwardly about these ongoing
did friends find their footing again? Thai-Indian community members speak out events or are showing a disregard or disinterest in this, I have subconsciously
on this relatable matter. lowered my expectations of them. I am friends with them, but this situation
has shed a light on what people truly care about, what they would stand up for,
and where they draw the line; and I am honestly disappointed, in most people
PIYAPHORN DOOWA and some of my friends.
Therapist

Context
RIMI CHHATPAR
I am the oldest in my group of friends, Make-up Artist
and I was the first one to get married. I
moved from Pattaya to Phuket to begin a Context
new chapter of my life. Naturally, I had to I got married and moved to Hong Kong.
adjust to a new lifestyle, which got lonely Moving out of Bangkok was relatively
sometimes, and I was far removed from easy for me initially, as I wanted to leave
my friends. the community and explore before I even
met my husband. However, I discovered
Tips for Maintaining My Friendships
quite quickly that I underestimated the
ease and value of childhood friendships
1. I often communicated to my friends compared to friendships that you make
that I am still the same person, and that as an adult.
my schedule and circumstances have
changed, not me. I asked them not to take Tips for Maintaining Friendships at
my silence personally. By doing this, I was Home
acknowledging the change and distance
they might have been feeling from my move 1. I am not great at keeping in touch
as well.
consistently, which I know is a drawback
2. When I am unavailable, I give my friends of my own, but I was lucky enough to have
a time that I will call them back, and I friends that were happy to reconnect
actually do so. My friends and I often have more when I was in Bangkok than via
video call dates with three or four of us on other platforms while I was away. They
a call. and I both understood that life moved
forward for both of us in our respective
3. The number of friends I keep in touch places, and when we met again, it was a way to catch up and revisit all the great
with has decreased – and that’s okay. things that kept our bond intact in the first place.
Initially, I was keeping in touch with a huge
number of people. Now, I choose a few 2. My connection with friends also changed from having many friends to very strong
to update regularly and keep in the loop bonds with a few. I have learnt that having a few friends by your side through
because of other commitments and time thick and thin is all that I need – it’s about quality, and not quantity.
restraints.
4. With friends that I still dearly care about but am not able to keep in touch
with regularly, I let them know in advance about my plans to visit. I show that
I genuinely am looking forward to meet them. I put in the effort to plan a date
and confirm the venue to show that I do care and that we vibe when we are
together. I make sure that my planned time with them is uninterrupted.
5. My closest friends and I made a promise to one another to send at least one
photo a day to the group. This picture could be of anything; a picture of a meal
we made, a picture of one of us playing with a pet, anything. If we did not
manage to send a picture that day, we owed everyone a small sum of money.
This is a really fun and great way to keep in touch and feel part of each others’
lives. The pictures can be conversation starters, but generally they are also self-
explanatory, explaining what is going on without the tediousness of using words
and formalities like, “Hi, how are you? What’s going on?” It’s a low-maintenance
way of being in each others’ lives.

MASAL A LITE ISSUE 158 - FEBRUARY 2024