Page 28 - Masala Lite Issue 166 October 2024

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of guests attending. Suddenly the serving platters

are only sparsely filling up half the table. It will be a You know what else is scary?! Putting your first

trick, definitely not a treat, when people comment book out into the world! You may be sick of

that they left your house hungry. seeing me all over this issue, but if you haven’t
had enough yet, please do order my debut book,
Au-naturale hair
Not Indian Enough! I was born with a rare gene
You won’t need to wear a scary costume if the rain, that possesses me to buy many pairs of shoes,
humidity, or beach weather puffs up your hair and and doctors say there’s no cure for it so I have

there’s no beauty salon in sight. Not to mention if to sell lots of books to manage the symptoms
there’s a social event planned when you’re in between
An unreformed party girl and mother hair washes. If only P’Kung could fly in on her magic

of two, author, editor and observer broomstick whenever you need her.
Sumati Huber tries to
make sense of our unique When the cake at the party isn’t eggless Your chai is warm
Thai-Indian society and the aunties There’s nothing more terrifying than wanting some If it’s not served as if it was bubbling hot from a
that she will one day become. cauldron, then what’s the point of life? Chai can never
dessert to satisfy your sweet tooth, but the new

fast you’re keeping means you must be completely be hot enough, and each sip should feel like a fiery
vegan. It will hug that soothes your soul.
vegan. It will
Scary things Indians Have to all be worth When your in-laws are in a mood
all be worth
it
it though for
though
for
Deal With the blessings Maybe they feel that you don’t visit them enough or
the blessings
that will come to you.
that will come to you. you have too many silly rules about feeding your kids
sugar, but in-laws can sometimes show their devil
Explaining to
Explaining to horns (even though they are always angels, really!)
“Yay, it’s Halloween month!” said no Indian mother your waxing But if you’re not married then you’re lucky to not have
your waxing
ever, as they shake their heads and ‘tsk-tsk’ at their to deal with this. But that means…
lady that you
children getting more excited about a gora festival lady that you
shaved between
than the ones in their own culture. So we will respect shaved between Not being married
appointments
appointments
that by not giving too much attention to Halloween Of all the ghoulish frights you could ever go through,
Actually,
you
don’t
but instead celebrate its spooky spirit by talking about Actually, you don’t not being married, or worse, not wanting to get
even have to say it. The
real-life scary things Indians experience (with fear of even have to say it. The
wizardry of the waxing
our mothers being the first example). wizardry of the waxing married, will make all the days of your single life

lady means they can spot reminiscent of 31 October. Beware!
lady means they can spot
There’s not enough food at an event the stubble from a mile
the stubble from a mile
away and it will be your own
If there’s one thing Indians do well, it’s feeding away and it will be your own
with
if
fault
cursed
you’re
people. But horror of horrors, maybe your cook is fault if you’re cursed with
ingrown hair.

off for the day, or you underestimated the number ingrown hair.

MASAL A LITE ISSUE 166 - OCTOBER 2024