Page 14 - Masala Lite Issue 157 January 2024

14 SPILL THE CHAI

RASMEET SACHDEJ

Motherhood has profoundly changed every aspect of
Community members reveal how my life. I often say I didn’t give birth to my daughter;
she gave birth to the mum and woman in me I never
motherhood has changed them. knew existed. As a young mother with minimal help,
I remember always feeling overwhelmed, scared,
and exhausted while managing her newborn
BY NARISA PHICHITSINGH stages, doubting my abilities constantly. After
having my second child, I was able to calm down
and enjoy the moments more. These are a few
he moment one becomes a mother, one is forever changed. lessons I learned in my motherhood journey:

And one can simply never go back to that pre-motherhood
Doing Something for Myself: I started my
point. I quickly learned and experienced that the physical,
own business when she was six months old, as
emotional and mindset changes of becoming a mother are
I needed something to which I could divert
unmatched by any other major life event. Not only are all my
my attention. It really helped me stay sane
online searches regarding my daughter, my level of protectiveness and became my business and creative outlet.
and my daily routines are forever challenged and altered. I start my
day at 5am to my daughter’s voice saying, “Mama, Mama, Mama,” Trusting My Gut Instincts: Mums, new and experienced,
telling me, in the best way she knows how at this age, “I’m awake! always receive a wave of unsolicited advice that can
I’m awake! Now let’s go out and play!” Instead of sleeping in on drown out confidence. No child is the same, so what
the weekends, I am playing slider with my 14-month-old at 6am, I works for others might not work for you, and vice versa.

spend my free time pumping each night so my daughter can receive
Realising the Learning Journey: I was learning how to be a
as many antibodies as possible, and I watch potty-training videos
mum while still discovering who I was as a woman, which
instead of the latest shows on Netflix.
meant making mistakes along the way and accepting myself.
Apart from all the fun that we have each day and the new bond that
Recognising Strengths and Weaknesses: Being okay with asking
we share, my husband and I also have numerous heavy conversations
and receiving help, recognising that I don’t have to do everything for my children
about her growth, nutrition, and development, and how we can
all the time, and that doesn’t make me a bad mum.
provide our toddler with a good childhood. Like all mothers on this
earth, we worry, we plan, we obsess, we laugh, and we constantly Finding a Balance: Balancing my life and goals while giving quality time to my kids
try to balance it all. I talked with three other mothers who are role because a happy mum means happy kids.
models to me about how they have evolved through motherhood.
Emotional Regulation: Learning how to regulate my emotions and deal with
my insecurities so I don’t pass it on to my kids – a lesson I wish I grasped earlier.

Giving Support to Other Mums: Extending support, acknowledgment, a helping hand,
and grace to other mums because we are all trying to do our best with the deck of

JASNAM SACHATHEP cards we have. In the ongoing journey of motherhood, these lessons have shaped my

growth, resilience, and unwavering commitment to doing my best for my children
while fostering support for fellow mums.
We’ve all heard the phrase, “hands full, hearts full.”
That’s literally been motherhood for me. I have
two kiddos, Kavi who is turning five and Jaanvi RANI SACHDEV
who is turning three. Anyone with a toddler
knows that life is a rollercoaster, and so can
you imagine having two? I’m a very family- Before becoming a mom, I did not fully understand
oriented person, so my kids are my life but the work, energy, and sacrifice that went into the role
as they grow and change, parenting only of a mother. Motherhood changed me in the best
becomes that much more challenging with way possible. I had no idea it was possible to love
each phase of life. I have had to really keep someone so deeply and profoundly that I would
my calm and forgo many things. I’ve had to never be the same again. Motherhood has this
refocus my values to make sure they align way of making me more easygoing, adaptable,
with the way I raise my kids. I constantly try and in tune with my instincts. I learnt that things
to remind myself to be the best version of don’t have to be perfect.
me that I can be, as my kids will eventually
become my ‘mini mes!’ For example, my daily routine is completely
thrown off now! Spontaneous hangouts and
I am a spontaneous and social butterfly by late nights are not as frequent, but I’ve learned
nature, and having kids places limitations on to embrace the unpredictability. On the work
that since I choose to put them first. My social front, I’ve transitioned to part-time, ensuring I
scene had to be carefully optimised and now have more days to dive into adventures with my
includes my kids!
son. It’s a bit of a juggling act, but it strikes a balance,
In terms of my marriage, I have really had to prioritise allowing me to savour the precious mum moments
time with my husband. Having a conversation is not while staying connected with my professional side.
as easy as before with ears everywhere (literally) and The beauty lies in navigating this new chapter with
constantly-divided attention. I have had to really flexibility, embracing imperfections, and cherishing
learn how to give my time and attention to both my kids the authentic joy that motherhood brings. It’s a wild
and my husband in a healthy and happy manner. ride, but one that I wouldn’t trade for anything!
MASAL A LITE ISSUE 157 - JANUARY 2024