Page 38 - Masala Lite Issue 162 June 2024

38 MUSINGS OF AN AUNTY WHO NEVER EVER MESSES WITH FATE

Fate Always Has the Last Word (and the Last Laugh)

Dolly Koghar will never say never – and neither should you!

I didn’t get to marry my dreamboat ‘cause I hadn’t
even started dreaming yet; neither do I remember
wishing to live, almost forever, in a hitherto-
unfamiliar, non-English speaking country like Japan.
More and above, even in my wildest imagination, I
couldn’t have envisioned my genes being passed down
to four other lives. The unplanned isn’t always all bad
after all. But little did I know that a huge storm was
brewing around the corner.
Let’s say you’ve had enough of your best friend’s
dramae-bazzi – you blurt out, “I’ll never speak to you Now, I wouldn’t know if in some past life, I’d yelled or
again,” but suddenly realise you’ve shared too much whispered, “kabhi, kabhi, kabheeeee naheeee,” (never
private info, so best to scramble back into her ‘friends’ ever), to which I must have fervidly shaken my head the
list. But if in your irritation you’d hollered, “I’ll never, side-to-side, North Indian way, and definitely not the
ever, ever, talk to you again,” then girdle yourself for ambiguous, down-South way of sliding the neck side- knew it? And this, despite the fact that it was about
spilled beans and bad blood. The point is, whether to-side. What I’m saying is that relocating permanently the same time that handbag-snatching and daylight
intentional or unintentional, the words “never ever” to India wouldn’t be on any Thai-Indian’s must-do robberies were the order of the day in our City of
literally translated themselves and successfully list, and especially not in my case, having already been Angels!
severed your ties. accustomed to precise, perfect Japan. Even though
today, Bharat stands centre on the world’s stage, It’s uncanny that when the move to Bangalore began,
However, when it comes to life, the “never ever” you’d boasting top-notch facilities, malls, eateries and pubs I didn’t bring down the roof and protest, “Bah; are you
shouted from rooftops, whether it was something far surpassing our good ‘ol Krung Thep; very rare brave being funny? I’ll never ever go to that stinky country,
you’d “never ever” do, or a person to whom you’d souls would enthusiastically leave behind our familiar with beggars and dirt everywhere!” But Fate didn’t
“never ever” marry, or a country you’ll “never hometown’s traffic and pollution, to relocate to an ask my opinion, and almost overnight, as if life was on
ever” relocate to, not even as a tourist; the more even more chaotic Indian town. auto-mode, I landed up in India.
emphatically and vehemently you said it, the higher
the chances that the exact opposite will manifest. Though just a stone’s throw away, India is another To clear any confusion, I didn’t say “never ever” to
But then again, life is a tragic comedy; a broth of the planet, one that’s been portrayed for too long as India simply because I never dreamt I’d go there, ever.
unexpected, undreamt and unpredictable twists and dirty and dusty; a land of snake charmers; a picture of But life is amusing and if given a choice, I’d now like to
turns; never ever boring. Maggie Smith’s matriarch in poverty and beggars; rife with thugs and cheats. But spend my sunset years in Bangalore. Also, the honest
Downton Abbey: A New Era (2022) wisely summarised just for argument’s sake, which country on this planet truth is that, although I’ll always be a true-blue Thai-
it: “That’s life, isn’t it? Getting past the unexpected doesn’t have its fair share of all of the above? So why Indian, choking up at the national anthem, I did say
and perhaps learning from it.” However, life’s lessons is it that during my childhood, this joke was floated “never ever” to resettling back in Krung Thep. But life
went wasted on me – I didn’t understand that life just around in excess: that if you left your hand out of the has the last say and the last laugh, and here I am in
happens, and it couldn’t care less whether I trudged window, be it of your car, a train, or even an airplane, good ‘ol Sukhumvit!
along, willingly or begrudgingly. your watch or kara would disappear before you even

MASAL A LITE ISSUE 162 - JUNE 2024